Category Archives: autobiography

Dealing with Death, Dealing with Life

A Parting Word

You are lights.
Wherever you are is lighted.
You are never in darkness.
You are only approaching darkness.
You are never in death.
You are only approaching death
for when death is entered
it is life.
For you are alive.

Therefore, once you have found yourself
you are infinitely safe
for you are always who you are:
Ultimately, when you return Home
to be received by God,
you will welcome yourself
with love and understanding.
from “Enmanuel’s Book” A manual for living comfortably in the cosmos. Introduction by Ram Dass. Compiled by Pat Rodegast and Judith Stanton

I thought I would never be able to handle, much less deal with my Father’s death. 1 year, heck, even 2, 3 years before my Father passed away, I was always anxious and fearful that my Father would die. I constantly bit my bottom lip and would cry ferociously. I cried on the subway. I cried walking to work. I cried walking from a party. I cried walking to the Bodega. I cried in the middle of a conversation. I cried always, always at witnessing love between family members, couples, puppies, even cartoons. I bit my bottom lip every night while I was sleeping, that to this day, I have 2 black bite marks on my bottom lip that I try to hide. People ask me, “Why do you have that on your lips?” I tell them that I bite my lip uncontrollably but I don’t tell them why. In the Fall of 2010, my Father told us he was diagnosed with cancer. What? Leukemia. What? My heart–What?–dropped. Then it started pounding a thousand beats at once. What? Why? Why? No. No. Why? Not him. What? Why him? Ok. No. Never will I accept this. Ok, I need to accept this. What? No. Repeat. For 3 years.

6 months ago, on June 1, 2013, my Father passed away. I was there with him when he passed on to his next journey. I was so happy, honored, and very blessed to be there with him. I was holding his hand. Wait, he was holding my hand, and I remember when he tightened my hand into his. I knew this gesture meant he was ready to go. I was the only person with him. My mother left the room an hour before to take a nap. She was so tired and so relieved I was there to be with him. For she was in the ICU all 9 days, he was there, day and night, with them. She needed to rest. My brother, David left a few hours before. He never accepted that our Dad was sick and was going to die. Just like me, David was always questioning, Why and being in denial, No, this is not happening. I didn’t accept it all, until 1 month prior to my Father’s death. One day over the phone, my BFF, Gabby, gently said, “Do you know death is a part of life. Your Father is going to die, Moana. All of us are one day.” I sobbed with acceptance. I sobbed for departure. I sobbed again because it felt good to let all the tears and sorrow out. I knew I was ready for anything. I just wanted to be with him. Be there for him. Be there with him before he took his last breath. And I was.

My father passed away in the late afternoon on a beautiful, sunny Saturday on the 1st of June 2013. He passed away at home, my parents home in Sandy, Utah. I flew in from New York City that day, only a few hours before he passed away. He got to see my smile and laugh. I got to see him smile and laugh in his eyes. (I’m taking a little moment to just cry while I write this because I remember that moment so well.) The chemo and cancer impacted his physical body so much, that his face was so sunken in and his mouth could no longer be controlled by his muscles. It just hung open like the rest of his body. Everything, his ears, his arms, just hung, flapped out, swollen and sore, laid out to rest like soggy laundry craving the sun for warmth and to dry. My Father was in the ICU for 9 days before he passed away; of course, he was spent. He finally came home, where he wanted to be. With his family. With me. I have it, that my Father was waiting for me to come back to say Goodbye. (I have to take another moment, to cry and blow my nose). 9 days earlier, I told him, “Papa, I will be back. I’m going to NYC now. I will be back, ok, ok, Papa, listen to me, I will be back, I’m going to NYC and will be back here, with you. With you Papa. ‘Ofa lahi atu.” He gave me this look of, You better, I will miss you. I love you. Come back soon. I did come back to see him go. I saw his soul leave his body. He was in Peace. Even though his physical body was so weak, his spirit was so STRONG. SO much LIGHT in that man, so BRIGHT, so much LOVE. His soul left in peace and in great slow flight. I was overwhelmed with so much profound love and peace. My Father passed away in great peace, freedom and light.

I want you to know my Father was unstoppable love, light, freedom, immense joy and happiness. He was the most generous and strongest man on the planet. He was very brilliant and very humble. Super funny and super smart. Everyone enjoyed his presence, even strangers. He created the world to be fun and enjoyable. He created this world to be sooo kind. My Father was a very, very kind man. When you met him, you got you were loved and accepted. Everyone knew him by his heart and his class. Yes, he was very classy. My Daddy had swagga before swagga was born. He taught what I value: love, passion, art, poetry, generosity, family. Yes, Family. My Father was family. He stood for family, our family, through it all: challenges, pain, struggles, sorrow, forgiveness. Forgiveness. My Father taught me how to forgive. Yes, to truly forgive. ‘Ofa lahi atu Papa. I love my life because of who you are and what you brought to me and this planet. Thank you for my life. Thank you for your life. Thank you. Thank you.

Mi Mama and Mi Papa and I. I love this picture of Us.  Provo, Utah. Sept 2009.

Mi Mama and Mi Papa and I. I love this picture of Us.
Provo, Utah. Sept 2009.

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September 11, 2013

Today he is not afraid to say this is what happened. Today he wants to know more.
He asked me yesterday, “Why does the U.S. want to bomb Syria?”
He listens to Tongan music and the Tongan Radio show in Utah every week. He says he wishes he spoke Tongan. He asks me how my Mum is.
Today he wants answers. Today he wants to know more.
Mo Maui 1
Mo Maui 2
Maui 1
Maui2
September 11, 1973 Santiago, Chile: He was not born yet. But this is his birthplace. He will be born on Sept. 12th. One day after, 5 years later.Year 1982 Provo, Utah: I am 4 years old. My family move from La’ie, Hawai’i and arrive in Utah. Provo, Utah to be exact. We are here to begin a new life.Year 2000 Provo, Utah: He is 21 years old and leaves Santiago, Chile for the United States of America. Provo, Utah to be exact. He has grown up with Pinochet, Universidad de Chile, and Don Francisco. He arrives here with his sister, Daniela to learn English. They are here to begin a new life.
September 11, 2001 New York City: I was supposed to meet Joy downtown. I do not. I call her a few minutes before the 1st plane hits. Let’s meet another date and time. The clear blue sky is filled with black clouds for days. Thank goodness I am with Gabby. We pray and cry together.
Summer 2009 Provo & Moab, Utah: He meets a Tongan girl, me. He calls me his Tongana, mi amor, mi vida, mi cielo. I call him Maui, Baby, corazon. He teaches me Te amo. I teach him ‘Ofa atu.
September 27, 2009 Provo, Utah: We are married. We love each other. Our union creates Tonga Chile.
Winter 2009 Sandy, Utah: He is 32 years old when he will hear the words–Allende, Coup, CIA, Murder– for the first time, in our bed. We discuss war after we make love. We exchange history as well as kisses. He can not believe the black and white footage we watch together. He envies my brown eyes. He thinks his blue eyes can only see lies. He calls his father, Omar, former General in Pinochet’s army. Papa, is it true? His father tells him, “Pinochet is the best thing that happened to Chile.” I do not sleep that night. He holds me even tighter.
Summer 2010 NYC, NY: We move to NYC together. He wants to go to Ground Zero. We drive around NYC in his truck blasting Victor Jara. He is proud to be American–South American.Fall & Winter 2010: He moves to Manassas, Virginia. I file for a divorce. We do not see each other for 3 months. 3 months of breaking & crying a part. Separation becomes unbearable. We still love each other. I ride the Chinatown bus from NYC to Washington DC and back for 2 years every week. He drives around Washington DC & Virginia listening to Tiro de Gracia. He sees the Capitol Building, White house, and Washington Memorial for the first time.June 2011: I move to Manassas, Virginia so we can be together. I never thought I would leave my NYC. For him, I will. Let’s work things out. Let’s stay together. A South Pacific Islander and a South American in the South of the United States of America.Jan. 2013: We are separated again. I move back to NYC. For myself, I will. He moves back to Utah. I want the divorce finalized. He wants whatever I want. I don’t want him to want what I want. I want him to want what he wants. Loca y Loco. We both want visibility. We both want to be seen. We love each other but we are not together.June 1, 2013 Sandy, Utah: My father passes away. I live in Utah for 3 months to be with my family. I begin a new life. I still love him. I love myself.
Today September 11, 2013 Sandy, Utah: We are both back in Utah. We are friends who love each other. What does it mean to be together? Tonight we start celebrating his birthday. He will be 36 years old tomorrow. He will call his Father, Omar and brother, Claudio in Chile while we, here in Utah, drink Chile from a bottle of wine. He has not been back to Chile for 13 years. We still exchange ‘Ofa atu at the end of every phone call. I go back to NYC next week.
Feliz Cumpleanoz MSQP. Te amo para siempre. ‘Ofa lahi atu.
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‘Ofa lahi atu Papa & it’s My Birthday!!!

Long Beach, California June 2013

Long Beach, California
June 2012

What can I say?  What shall I write?  I have not written a post at all this year. Well, here is the 1st one.
There is so much more to say. But when? If not now, then when? Right?
First of all, I am devastated. I am extremely sad and torn. My heart has broken up into tiny little pieces and I am trying to s-l-o-w-l-y without confidence but with great determination and sorrow to put them together in a creative, artistic and moana love kind of way. My Father is gone and I feel like I am gone too. When folks ask me if I am okay or how I am doing, I want to SCREAM. I am not okay. I am feeling beyond blue. I am very, very, very, very, very, very sad.
I need time to be like this. I need time to be in this. I can’t just quickly smile, “He’s in a better place. He’s no longer suffering. Alright, everything is so happy!” I am definitely not happy. Really, I want you to go away.

Today I remember my Father and I want to speak of him and about him and share all who he was to me.  I absolutely LOVE my Father and the love he had for me and the whole entire world was and is SO INFINITE and DIVINE.  I have never met anyone who has the LOVE like my father has. What a great example. Did I say yet, that I miss my father????
Today is my Birthday and I’m saying, Happy Birthday Papa! You gave me your life, so that I can have the life I have now. I am so thankful and grateful to you and your life and who you are to me! Your LOVE is truly AMAZING and GREAT and AWESOME and….You’re AMAZING and GREAT and AWESOME, Papa!
I miss you.
I really, really miss you. Yes, I know you are with me in spirit and I feel your great presence. But dayum, I miss you in the physical world. I really, really do.
I hold my heart as I write this.
You were such a Great man and Father. I can’t wait to share all that I have learned from you!!! and to tell your story in my Art!!!
‘Ofa lahi atu.

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Year 2012 Completion

Created a special year end 2012 altar: filled with stones from the Irish Sea, and from the Pacific Ocean from Tonga and Fiji.

Sun 12.30.2012 I created a special year end 2012 altar: filled with stones from the Irish Sea, and from the Pacific Ocean from Tonga and Fiji.

YEAR 2012 Completion: My review of my year, my adventures, my prayers, my lessons and acknowledgements. Thank you to YOU ALL for making this year so freakin’ AMAAAZING! You truly give me my life. punto. I know this. I am here because of you. I would not have had this amazing year without you!

Dear Beautiful Peeeeeeppps, I LOVE Completion. Like for real. I LOVE 100 percent completion (That is one of the lessons I got this year, you can read more in MY LESSONS) because it feels soooo good. Lord knows, there are still so many things on my INCOMPLETION list to complete (Dang, can’t wait to complete them but for now, I can say that I am complete with them being incomplete) However, I can directly say out loud, “This is officially complete.” Like, declaring, this year is 2012 100 PERCENT COMPLETE! Here we go!
***2012 was the the year I pushed myself past my fears, past my comfort zone, past my physical limits, waaaaaaaay past where I would usually say, “I can’t do anymore”—ANNNND I did more. (i.e. when I worked on the murals in LA, I got up at 5 am and worked until 10 pm for 3 weeks. My physical body was waay past tired and my mind was in high gear everyday. During the fundraising for the Souljourney Truth Tour 2012- 2013, the schedule was similar. I have not worked so hard in my life than this year AND I LOVED IT!) Not only did I do more, but I gave more heart & soul. I shared like waaaaaay past how I thought I could ever fully express myself. I stepped into the unknown, dark, ugly and uncomfortable places of myself. I did not step over anything–I did not NOT say anything, or hide anything. I put everything in the LIGHT to truly get FREE.  2012 was a year where I met and made new BEST FRIENDS & Familia: Lah Tere (Teresita Ayala), Binni (Robin Fifita) and Carol (Carolina Bonilla). These amazing sisters who have come in my life, like they were always there. I absolutely love these sisters and I thank them for all they have given me and taught me. 2012 was also the year to truly let go of people in my life that did not serve me. I let go of 3 people in my life that I considered “family.” Because I was not stepping over anything in my life and not “tolerating” the smallness in my life, I had to let these people go. 2 of these people were friends that I have known for more than 12 years and this year, 2012, was the year for me to say, “No, this is not what I want. This is not making me grow. Why am I settling in these friendships?” I didn’t just walk away from these relationships but I completed them powerfully. I had closing conversations with them and told them why I am ending this. I gave them a chance to share what was there for them. I listened. No drama. No yelling or fights. Just completion conversations. 2012 is the year where I truly owned my voice. I shared my feelings. I confronted confrontations. I asked non-stop for what I wanted. I did not stop at a NO–not even when I when I was the one who was saying NO. I took myself ON like nothing else before. I went deep into my fears and I am so happy I did 🙂 Now I can fully own all those dark places of my self cuz I really get that I can only be a light worker–and my light can only be seen–in the dark. 2012 where I experienced myself as the artist that I say I am: a poet, a painter and an actor. 2012 is the year my favorite uncle died, Saia and when my father started chemo. My birthday this year was so amazing because I got to go to sleep and wake up to my dad and mum’s voices 🙂

MY ADVENTURES: 1-(Jan – May 2012) I was a part of the most amazing team I have ever worked with in my life, like no kidding, this team was freakin’ incredible! I was hired by CUNY’s (City University of New York) ASAP Program Headquarters to be a part of a team of 17. It was truly fulfilling and one of the most amazing teaching experiences I have had in my life. The ASAP Program is only offered in any of the 2 year colleges in CUNY (Hostos, Brooklyn College, Laguardia, I’m missing 2 others). It’s an incredible program which offers ANYONE (you can be 17 or 77 years old) free tuition, a free metro card all year long, a career specialist and a counselor to make sure you graduate and received your associates degree. More than 80 percent of the students from the ASAP program move on to get their Bachelors degree. Out of the 17 of us, 4 were Leaders, including myself, who partnered with 1-2 Student Leaders (Alumni of ASAP) per workshop. We traveled all over NYC. I went to high schools all over NYC I never knew existed. I saw for myself, the education system in NYC. I went to places in the Bronx I have never been to, I absolutely LOVE the Bronx. I was the leader who focused on leading in the Bronx and Harlem (Uptown, baby, we gets down, baby) but I also did workshops in Queens and Brooklyn too. My Student Leader Team was the best! Their stories, which were shared everyday at the workshops, were not only an inspiration to all the students but to me. Ohhh, I can share on and on about them. The high school students we met thought they never were gonna go to College, or ever leave there hood. By the time, our workshops were done, they were like, I’m going to College, where do I sign up?! They got to see that nothing could stop them–if they were undocumented, if they were failing classes, if a parent was incarcerated, if they were currently homeless, nothing was going to stop them, absolutely nothing. With my Student Leader team, we led workshops to 1,200 students and altogether as a team of 17, we led workshops to over 5,000 students in NYC!!! At our closing event, our team was recognized to accomplish the most in a short amount of time, in the history of CUNY in general. We not only met our goals but we surpassed them. We got national attention in The New York Times and Harvard University gave us shout out’s for bringing EDUCATION to ALLLLLLLL. I give major props to Melissa Fernandez and Patricia Hicks who were the head honchos in leading our team of 17. If it was not for your leadership, we would not have accomplished so much–and have the most Fun and Best time while doing it!
2-My paintings were in 7 exhibits this year in NYC, San Francisco and Florida. (Broadway Housing Gallery in Harlem, State Capital Building in Harlem, The Central Park gallery and the Steve Kirsh Gallery). I got to exhibit with amazing artists like Leon Golub and Kiki Smith. I got to talk to Felipe Luciano about my paintings on the radio. I sold a painting for $3,000.00!!! ( At the beginning of 2012, I said, I’m going to sell my paintings for $3,000.00 or more. Even more importantly, I know how I did it, so I can do it again and again in 2013! I started owning the value of my artwork and myself.)
3-2012 was the birth of my first international art project “WORLD LEADERSHIP: Women, Presence & Power.” I absolutely love this project–it’s so amazing. 2013, is the year when she starts to walk. 2-I did 6 solo performances of my poetry & monologues: in NYC (Mama Tingo Closing event), Chicago (National Writers Conference), Washington DC (Busboys and Poets), Arlington, Virginia (twice! for SULU DC and SULU DC’s collaborative event with the National Asian Conferrence) and Dublin, Ireland (For the Adult writers group, Write On).
4-I was in the VAGINA MONOLOGUES!!! This for me, was really a dream come true. I absolutely love Eve Ensler and her work. I was in 2 performances in the Vagina Monologues in Harlem (That monologue I performed, I really got to have a blast with it and share my acting skills.) Also, this year, Eve Ensler publicly became one of our Supporters of Mahina Movement’s Souljourney Truth Tour.
5-I went to LA twice to be with my family and to create the “Raices Murales.” I worked with over 160 students and adults in Bell, California. It was my very 1st mural project.
6-I lived in Manassas, Virginia from July 2012 to today and I’m moving back to NYC in 2013. (THIS is alllll For LOVE, FOR LOVE). I have traveled from VA to NYC more than 20 times this year (by bus, by car). I HAVE MY OWN CAR and you can witness me zooooommming! (Yup, he gave it to me for my Birthday!) I got to do a road trip with my BFF, Gabby to New Paltz from New York and then drive back to Virginia. I have been and seen places in Pennsylvania, Delaware, Maryland, Washington DC and Virginia for the 1st time. I have never witnessed the U.S.ofA like this before.
7-Mahina Movement did 27 performances and led 7 workshops in 2012. We performed with Angela Davis for the 3rd time and we also had the amazing honor to perform with Alice Walker, Russell Simmons, and Tibetan monks. I got to meet Cynthia McKinney and Majora Carter! 8-The Soul Journey Truth Tour jumped off and we performed in our 1st International Country! We raised $15,000!!! $822.00 went to Hurricane Sandy relief communities! We had 5 people travel to Ireland to perform and do workshops in Dublin, Bray and Arklow, Ireland. We created over 190 LOVE FLAGS representing NYC, Ireland and Indigenous people of North America.
9-I had my 1st photo shoot for re:spect! I actually had 2 photo shoots for re:spect! Thank you to the most amazing photographer, William Orellana and all my models who made these events so great.
10-I led 3 Silk Screen workshops including 1 at the United Nations and 2 at The Brecht Forum. I also got to lead a workshop with Ping Chong and Jesca about the Undesirable Element curriculum that I have been a part of for 13 years.
11-LEADERSHIP in the house!!!! Self Expression Leadership Program in the hizhows! I coached (I had 5 participants that completed their program successfully! from Jan – March) and am now head coaching the Self Expression Leadership Progam at Landmark Education (I have 4 coaches and 13 participants). Our SELP ends on Feb. 28, 2013. I absolutely LOVE the SELP. I can’t wait to lead the SELP in 2013!

MY (s0-called) FAILURES:
1-I was a finalist for this mural in Harlem. I didn’t get that mural but I know why. The waitress I spoke to on the phone. Now I am the lead artist for this mural in South Bronx about Mothers and their children from West Africa. Meet the Artist and workshops start in March 2013! 2-I applied to 5 fellowships/projects and I did not get any of them. But I still went 100 percent out for them!!!! And that gave me one of the best experiences/lessons of my life: I can give 100 percent of my best self to something or someone and if I don’t “win” it doesn’t matter because I am not stopped. This is what it means to be truly unstoppable. 3-SULU DC’s Artist of the year. I did not get it but I was so happy to be recognized by the community! 4-I set out to go to other countries in Europe for our Souljourney Truth Tour: Italy, Spain, England and Portugal and to do a mural in Ireland. None of this happened and I’m okay with it. It didn’t happen but now I can see clearly what I have to do to make it happen! 5-Pay back all my DEBT–no I still have mad debt like alllll my Student Loans for Columbia University and New York University. Instead of avoiding and hiding in my student loan debt (I got no credit card debt, that’s right) I am OPEN and OUT about it. I’m truly FREEEEEEEEEEE! And I am handling my business!

MY LESSONS:
1-Be what you want. Like for real real. You want Love then you got to be love. You want Inspiration, then you gotta be Inspiring. The same goes for this: You are bored, that means you are boring. You are not having fun because you are not fun. BE IT and then GET IT.
2-There is no where to go. Yup, there is absolutely no where to go. You think that one day, it’s going to be Ding, Ding, Ding, I got it! Um, No. Not True at all. The time is now. There is no prize to get. Every day, breath is it. There is no where to go.
3-This is it. That’s right, this your ONE life. We got what we got and we don’t got what we got. What you gonna do?
4-Wine is good (And this is coming from a Mormon raised gurl). Yo, wine is really good. Meaning that Fun times must happen. I learned to really relax and have fun with my friends and celebrate. I’m such a workaholic, that many times, I would not want any time for leisure. I would just burn out and sleep for days. Instead of burning out, I really got to play and have fun this year! Like go to Sephora and get make-up done, eat lots of ice cream, pie and pastries, watch lots of good movies, and take long drives while following the moonlight. 5-Request galore. Ask away. Why wait? I ask for what I want. You should too.
6-100 percent completion. I love being 100 percent complete. Also, I know that I can be complete with being incomplete. And when I am incomplete, I’m getting complete, when? NOW. 7-People Matter. Friends Matter. Everything  do and am, I get because I have really good friends and people around me. I can show up because they listen to me as my TRUE ME. 8-Your Mind is not a terrible thing to waste. Your mind is terrible. period. I 9-Cheer Leading Squad in Full Effect. I have a whole cheer leading squad around me because I cheer and support people in their dreams and make sure they accomplish them. This entourage is the new black. You should get one too. 10-I have the SOUL of the Artist. I truly 100 percent know that my soul is that of an ARTIST. There is no turning back now. Only forward. 11-Being Unstoppable! Nothing and no one can stop me. Not even my own dang self.MY PRAYERS for 2013!
FREEDOM FOR ALL! Freedom for Palestine, Freedom for the DRC! Everyone eats gooood, healthy food! All the abundance in the world to you and your family! Blessings to everyone to really getting we are already enough. Sending you the most delicious juicy love and brilliant light!!! ‘Ofa lahi atuuuu!
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS: Shout outs to all ye amazing, beautiful peeps in mi vida! I’m so THANKFUL for you! MALO ‘AUPITO! Mi hermanas: Lah Tere, Robin “Binni” Fifita, Carolina Bonilla, AJ, Melissa, Trish, Charles Browning, Marie Varghese, Iman Khan, Re Perez, Bethany, Karen, Donte, Summer Sheridan, Tiffany Kapri Johnson, Melissa Corbett, Kambale, Omar and Janvieve, Regie Cabico, Kazembe and The Brecht Forum, Jamie Campbell and David, William Orellana and his family, Maria Marisigan, Aurora, all 300 people that funded our Souljourney Truth Tour, alllll the amazing youth and families that I met this year from LA to NYC to Ireland!!!!!!! ahhhhh yeahhhh! Mi brothers: Frank Lopez and Luke from The Peace Poets,  JL Umipig, My IRELAND gente: Niamh, Frannie, Mermaid Theater, Axis and Ballymun, Jamie for being “Amazeballs,” My SELP Crew: Ernest Biscardi who is simply the best leader, Nikki Brown, Olga, Vonda Roney, Ahimsa, My BFF, familia: Gabby “Gab*Star” My Mum and Dad, and to MSQP, te amo baby. ‘Ofa lahi atuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!
okay, I gotta do now, MSQP is calling me, we got a Polynesian celebration to go to in Maryland and we got some vision boards to make tonight. 2012 you are officially complete. 2013, here we are!!! Let’s goooooo! Let’s get it! HAPPPPPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!
LOVE YOU!
‘ofa lahi atu,
MoLuv

jumping off cliffs y building my own wings on the way…UP

“You’ve got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down.”
-Ray Bradbury, r.i.p.eace, power & perfection

On the day of his death (June 5, 2012), a friend, Lauren Over, shared with me as she was driving me to Orchard Academies in Bell, California (A city in Los Angeles county) Ray Bradbury’s (above) quote. It stuck with me since that day. This is my life. It was another day of painting a 14 wall mural 18′ x 354′ at Orchard Academies. This is my first (evaaa!) mural project that I am the Artistic Director and Lead Artist! That’s right, I had a lot to learn and am still learning. There has been a lot of stumbling and falling and tripping and climbing (I was on scaffolding on the daily, going up, coming down, going up, coming down. My hands had blisters and they were so use to climbing bars that after 24 hours off the scaffolding and on the other coast of the USA, my hands were still in the climbing bars position when I was sleeping.) I was in LA for 3 weeks and will return July 22, 2012 – August 19, 2012 to complete this mural which is called, RAICES MURALES.

The “real” Zainab standing in front of the painted portrait of Zainab. North East wall (Wall #1). Bell, CA

First day of priming the walls! I got paint in my face and in my eye and I love it. Awesome. Bell, CA

We are creating and painting the UNIVERSE!!! Bell, CA

CHILDREN OF THE SUN: Zainab, George, y Armando.
North East wall (Wall #1). This wall is almost done. Bell, CA

for more pictures of RAICES MURALES, check out my album on facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10150351344916858.397322.632536857&type=3

My life more than ever–choosing being Artist, choosing living life by my truth and art and owning it with my heart, mind, body and soul–is jumping off cliffs and learning how to fly. Like NOW. Not tomorrow or later in a few minutes. Now.  (Thank you Lauren. Thank you Mr. Bradbury for sharing a beautiful life, imagination, commitment, and your truth on this planet. I remember reading your stories when I was a kid with my big brother, David. David loooovves your stories.) I was sharing with my mentor/comrade/coach/co-leader/friend, Ernest, that I am scared and nervous–I’m taking on a new adventure. I will definitely share with you about it later–and he told me, “Moana, remember, it’s context. That same energy can be excitement. Which context do you choose?” Dang sun, I choose excitement. I’m helllaaaaaa excited! Dang, sometimes I don’t know what to do with  myself except just live my dreams on tha daily. LOL. palabra. Excitement it is and I’m excited in building my wings.

I am now in Manassas, Virginia (was in NYC for a day yesterday) and will be here for the next few weeks to get some much needed rest (When I was in LA, I was waking up at 5:00 am on that daily, started painting at 6:00 am and stopped painting at 9:00 pm, just to clean up and leave the Mural site at 9:30 pm sometimes 10 pm); PAINT, PAINT, PAINT (I absolutely love painting!!! I will be doing some new paintings!!! My goal is to do a painting everyday); doing some more production/prep work for RAICES MURALES (there is soooo much to get done before I return to LA later this month); launch my very first World Mural Tour kickstarter campaign–ahhhhhhhh, it’s happening! 1st confirmed wall is in DUBLIN, IRELAND with the Axis Arts Community Center in Ballymun, mi familia, I love this community. I will also continue working on the production and prep of Mahina Movement’s SOULJOURNEY TRUTH TOUR 2012, ohhh sookie sookie. Shameless plug: Listen to us on WBAI RADIO NYC 99.5 FM. We were live on the program, “First Voices Indigenous radio” hosted by our good friend and brother, Tiokasin Ghosthorse. Click on this link and look up First Voices Indigenous radio Thursday June 28, 2012 9:03 am  http://www.wbai.org/server-archive.html. Mahina Movement is going to have our working weekend retreat next weekend and I’m so looking forward to some fun, hard work and lots and lots of gooooood food. That’s how we roll, peeps. Also, I’m catching up on some much needed journal writing time and meditation, dog walks, reading, reading and reading and spending countless hours on the phone talking to family/friendz all over the world…. And are there any cooool movies/documentaries/films you have seen lately? Send them my way and I will check it out. I luuuvvvv chilaxin’ watching some good flix before I go back out “into the work” and “into the wild.”

And tonight…Are you in NYC?

I’m sending a huge shout out to my best amazing friend, sister, fam bam, Gabriella Callender for her show tonight, “LANDING ON EARTH.” I am so proud of her and I am blessed to have this amazing musician, singer, song writer on my path. If you are Brooklyn tonight, stop by and give the rest of my fam bam some love.
Here is the info:

Tonight! Friday June 29, 2012 Come join us for Landing On Earth!
Gabriella Callender/ DJ Oja!

* Children friendly, bring the whole Family!

Opening the Set with Singer-Songwriter Kyra Gaunt w/ Tomas Doncker on guitar /vocals!

Projected Visuals by Vanissa Chan!

Visiting Organization: Friends of the Congo!

Landing on Earth: A Monthly Folk Fusion Experience

The Last Friday of Each Month @ Two Moon Art House and Cafe

315 4th, Brooklyn, NY

7pm!

Performed by Gabriella Callender and DJ Oja!

$10.00 cover Drinks/Food for purchase

Next show: Friday, June 29th

Landing On Earth is a monthly celebration and inquiry of the human experience through the use of song.

On the last Friday of each month, in a cozy cafe in Brooklyn, Gabriella Callender and DJ Oja take you on a herstorical journey of the human experience from the dawn of time until the present.

In a musical conversation between the artists and the audience we dialogue about peace, war, patriarchy, domination, love, power and the human propensity to overcome the ego.

Folk music is the basic element we use to take this journey and it is fused with beats, sound, visual projections, and readings from herstorical texts.

We showcase independent visual artists, vendors and organizations.

Please come and join us for the next Landing On Earth show

P.S. Our intention of our Mahina Movement SOULJOURNEY TRUTH TOUR 2012 is to have each and every woman (the woman inside of every man, boy, girl, trans on the planet) own her voice. I shall begin with owning my own voice. I will be making more and more art. I’m unstoppable in my art making. Whether you like it or not, hate it or love it, that is not my job nor is that a part of my intention. The intention of my art making is to hold the integrity of my voice and it’s TRUTH. My job is to keep on making it, non-stop. Thank you for reading. Thank you for your listening. ‘Ofa atu.

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Happy Birthday David Niumeitolu!

35 years old.
Happy Birthday to my amazing brother David Niumeitolu, father of 8 children (my beautiful nieces and nephews), husband to the beautiful Ronnie Mailo Niumeitolu, my older brother, and the only son. Thank you for all that you are and have giving us. I’m so proud of you. And of course, you know, you share this day with Malcolm X ~ Happy Birthday David & Malcolm!

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NYC to LA to NYC to LA and back to NYC…to get to LA again…

pencil on paper.
Harlem Baby USA World
5.15.2012
draft drawings for drawing, painting and T-Shirt design for Abstract Nomadic Media (AbNomad)’s documentary feature film, “Nosotros los de la Saya / We of the Saya.”
drawing from a photo, Foto tomado por Sergio Daniel Estrada López. Sergio, tenia que robar esta foto tan linda que ustedes tomaron. Con compasión sostenemos al mundo…..
Los Yungas, Bolivia

Sometimes I feel like I am on Pacific time living in NYC.
Sometimes I am living in multiple worlds at a time: NYC, LA, Utah, Virginia, Tonga, Ireland and South Africa…I so miss South Africa right now.
And sometimes, I actually am living in all these worlds in “eastern time.”

Today I took on being BOLD. and yesssss, I took this on like no kdding. I’m very proud of myself actually. I feel like a new person, a new being that is still human.
Dreams Fulfilled.


I will be in LA for the whole month of June (this means I will be spending my Birthday in LA! Beach!)
painting multiple murals in Bell! Ohhhhhhhhh, I am way too excited and I waaaaaaaay can’t hide it.

Before I go to LA, I will complete:
-speak with Cornel West and Michael Moore and make my unreasonable requests this Friday.
-complete Silk Screening designs for 2 amazing people’s projects I totally believe in–wait and see my friends.
-have my 2nd Silk Screening class in NYC! whoop, whoop
-create all our Souljourney Truth Tour packages. I am so humbled and inspired by creating this.
-complete a successful coaching program with my participants in SELP (ahhhhh, what a freakin’ amazing program! This was the program of my Lifetime, like for reaaaalllllz)
-complete drawing for Murals!!! soooo inspired by the students’ drawings, watch out y’all!
-attend my capoiera classes, must do this. Talk with Michael about mural in his center, ohhh lalala.
-My Introduction to the Landmark Forum for Women, this is going to be an amazing night, come and invite your women: Thurs. May 24, 2012; 7 – 10 pm. Where: Landmark Education 317-A West 33rd Street; NYC, NY. (between 8th and 9th Ave.)
-attend Jaylyna’s performance at BB King’s, she is opening up for Slum Village. yayyy!
-have my 2nd Photo Shoot on May 26th. word up!
-hug all my loved ones. share the love. let people in my life know I love them so much.
-hug myself and tell myself te amoana. smile. drink lots of water.
-Oh yeah, this weekend I am doing my 2nd Communication Course: Power to Create. I am beyond thrilled to attend this.

‘ofa lahiiiiiiiiiii atu.
thank you universe.
malo ‘aupito.

dreams fulfilled.
when?

NOW.

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soul. journey. truth. tour. we. doing. this. aqui.

Let’s talk marketing…

Last night, Mahina Movement (Gabby, Erica y moi) went to the General Green restaurant in Brooklyn to meet up with Tara, an amazing marketing woman. This was the 1st time that Mahina Movement has had a conversation with a professional marketer.

We told her our plan. We told her who we are. We told her out intentions for the tour. We told her what we are out to accomplish in the world. We told her everything. We told her our fears and concerns. We told her our possibilities and stands. She got it all and she put us into action.

Along with the caramel ice cream, caramel syrup and caramel cake and pretzels we had for desert, which was complete heaven, we were left in complete inspiration and living our full, big lives. We got actions to do people. We got intentions to fulfill. We got who we are to the world. Thank you.

Thank you so much Tara for working with us.

See you in 2 weeks.
GAME ON!

Life is delicious.

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Mi Mama

Litia.
Litia Makakaufaki.
Litia Makakaufaki Niumeitolu.

I carry your name. I carry your Mother’s Name.  I carry your Father’s name.
I carry all of your names.
You are truly the Greatest. Mama.
You gave me ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE:
from Tonga to TVA in Lai’e, Hawa’ii to the Trailer Park to the Suburbs in Utah to NYC to Italy to South Africa and beyond…
Anything I said I wanted to do, you were right there to say, Yes, it can be done.
You are my Infinite possibilities. You are my it shall me done.
You are my Millionaire Communities.
You are my Maka. You are my rock.

Because you are, I am.

I am your youngest daughter.
I am your biggest fan.
I am your artist.
I am your cake and pasta maker.
I am so grateful to you for giving me life.
I am so grateful to you for giving me a GREAT life.

Malo ‘aupito Mama.

Thank you Mama.
Thank you Mama.
Thank you Mama.

(we are all standing for you. *giving you a standing ovation.* insert applause now.)

‘Ofa lahi atu Mama.

Mi Familia: L to R: Mum, to back row: Loa, sister, Fui, sister and our first cousin, Sepi, Dad. front row: Me, ‘Amelia, sister and David, brother. Laie, Hawai’i. Standing in front of the Mormon (LDS) Temple in Hawa’ii.

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Do you want to be my Friend?

My homework this week from my financial coach, the amazing Jaime, is:
To make  friends with:
1) artists who are leaders
2) prosperous artists
3) social (justice) entrepreneurs

Do you want to be my friend? Hollllleeeerrrrz

I got it now. Even if I have not communicated it directly, is that my art is my leadership.
I am an Artist because I am a Leader and I choose to have my art make a difference for the world.
I really, really got it.
My art is my leadership.

What is your art?

 

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